Ear

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This is a Swedish Win!
Dr. Sprokeberg's ear surgery stand.

An ear is an artificial organ designed to improve a Soyjak's hearing. Soyjaks can choose to install one ear on one side of the head, or two ears, one on either side. It is physically possible, but outlawed in most countries, to have more than two ears. They are becoming more and more common among Soyjaks for both their aesthetic function and the hearing ability that they grant. Animals can have ears but many animals, such as bugs and frogs, choose not to.

History[edit | edit source]

How it feels to have ears

Ears were invented by a Swedish Artist on May 31, 2019.[1] Early methods of ear attachment were complicated, expensive, and risky, until Dr. Sprokeberg, in an attempt to find a new treatment for schizophrenia, accidently discovered the first safe and effective method of ear surgery. Since then, millions of Jaks across the world have been able to afford ears, and revel in the benefits they provide. Some studies claimed to link ear usage to tinnitus, but Snopes has debunked them, saying: "Ears do NOT have any negative effects, short-term or long-term."

Thoughever, not all 'jaks particularly want their ears, and many attempts at removal have resulted in CRACK SKULLLL OYYYYYYYYYY MY GODDDDDDDDDDDD

The first soyjak to naturally possess ears is Impish Soyak Ears. He was created during a horrific genetic experiment carried out by the Swede, which involved taking an ordinary Wholesome Jak and ████████████████████████████████████████████████████████████ MEDS, SPROKE, BBC, AND EARS. NOW. IN THAT ORDER.

⚠DON'T CONSUME THE EARS⚠

You VILL attach ze ears

UND YOU VILL LISTEN TO EVERYTHING WE SAY WITH THEM.

Gallery[edit | edit source]

Citations