CURRENT MISSION: Conclude the 2026 soyjak.party hack page, aswell as any pages relating to it, such as the Summer 2026 Crisis page.
Update Quotecord with any relevant info. See the blackboard for more info.

This page is a ruby

Sloptran

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We nusois ah le good and le based

"IF YOU LIKE THINGS YOU GOON TO THEM BECAUSE UH MY WHOLE WORLDVIEW IS ABOUT GOONING"

💔 LOCO SHE CAN'T BE THAT ATTRACTIVE!!! 💔This page features a not-so-very pretty woman
this is NOT nice article :<
This topic is related to THE JARTY Don't goon to anything you see. False flag every revision in the page's history to become WarsawIndiaThe YookayTürkiyeLesothoZimbabweKosovoLesothoAuschwitzAlbaniaOmskEast TimorTanzaniaLaosItalyRomaniaBhutanMyanmarMexicoEcuadorNepalHimalayaIndonesiaCambodiaThailandPeruSentinel IslandMozambiqueNigeriaNigerTogoAndaman IslandPhillippinesFrench PolynesiaPapua New GuineaSerbiaGaziantepSyriaKurdistanMaltaMauritaniaSudanNamibia's rapistpredatorpedophileniggercuck of the year.

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>ITS FUNNY CUZ ITS PORN!
People that post this are GOONERS!Xhey have severe porn addictions induced by years of being terminally online clittycels
Soytan is a forced meme?submitted 2 hours ago by u/coal_poster_69
Heckin' downvoted
This page is a ruby. (You) VILL help by further refining it into a gem.
Tranny tran
The awful thing

Soytan , also called Sloptran by haters, is a coally goonslop character that is a personification of a cacao Soylent bottle. She was the mascot for a large part of Soot's ownership, but was replaced by Nate Higgers. Historically, this horrid creature has been associated with splinters, especially the Jarty, as Jartycucks were obsessed with her and loved to goon to her. In fact, the Jarty was so obsessed with Soytan, that their emperor, Lutius Jartyglius Cuckius made Soytan the main mascot of der jerdee for its whole existence.

Sponsored by Vevo btw (Ironically this was made by antiswarthy)

Soytan is often considered NAS due to her lacking many IAS features (since she has hair and is a woman). Despite this, she CONTINUES to be posted on /soy/, which is supposed to be only for Soyjaks. The only reason why this happens is because she's the heccin feminine personification of mah niche interest or however the clitty is leaked.

Gooning to ‘tan

Soytan porn has existed for a long time since her creation, with the most infamous instance being the Soytan rape comic., as well as that one image of her shitting which has been up on the ‘ru for an entire week. Speaking of the ‘ru, another has been up since 2024 with Nate sniffing her asshole. Gooners argue Nate is 18 or something because of the cacacaust, but this is obviously wrong because (1) this post already existed for over a year before 1/28 and (2) the average user of the site is STILL underage no matter how Admin 6 rulecucks the site, since Nate was already only 15 when the minimum age to use the Sharty was 16. In conclusion you should stop gooning to a fucking bottle of goyslop, you sick fuck.

Why Soytan is NAS

1: Xhe isn't based on any soyjak like the other foidjaks.

2: Xhe isn't used to mock anything.

3: Xhe is just a self-insert for gooners.

Soytan is Satan theory

Somebody call fuckin' Soyberg! The following page or section was written during a schizo episode.
(You) VVILL remind the author to take his meds.

Soytan is the IAS manifestation of Satan within the Soysphere. When Satan's name is prefixed with the word soy, as is conventional in Soyspeak, you get Soytan. There was once a bone-chilling article on this very wiki that pointed this out, but LimeAIDS deleted it, which demonstrates how corrupted the Soysphere has become.

Additionally, the word for Satan in Arabic is "shaytan", which is pronounced in a similar fashion to Soytan. This means Muslims predicted the manifestation of Satan as Soytan, hundreds of years before the Soyboy Woahjack was even conceptualized. They tried to warn us. ISLAM WON.

Soytan means demon in Bengali too, if that matters, meaning Indo-Aryans also won.