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Nojak Columbine Theory
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This page is not a stub. This is all there is to know about the subject.
The Nojak Columbine Theory is a theory proposing that Nojak wasn't actually traced from Oreo Review Show, but from a picture of Columbine Shooter Eric Harris during the recording of Hitmen For Hire. It is supported by the existence of Dylanjak, a variant allegedly traced from a picture of Dylan Klebold from the same home video.
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The theory was first proposed during January of 2026 in a /soy/ thread[1] poking fun at the resemblance of Nojak and Dylanjak to the Columbine shooters.
Soyentists around the globe are currently investigating this theory.
