CURRENT MISSION: Conclude the 2026 soyjak.party hack page, aswell as any pages relating to it, such as the Summer 2026 Crisis page.
Update Quotecord with any relevant info. See the blackboard for more info.
Nojak Columbine theory: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 13:47, 12 August 2026



The Nojak Columbine Theory is a theory proposing that Nojak wasn't actually traced from Oreo Review Show, but from a picture of Columbine Shooter Eric Harris during the recording of Hitmen For Hire. It is supported by the existence of Dylanjak, a variant allegedly traced from a picture of Dylan Klebold from the same home video.
Spread
The theory was first proposed during January of 2026 in a /soy/ thread[1] poking fun at the resemblance of Nojak and Dylanjak to the Columbine shooters.
Soyentists around the globe are currently investigating this theory, although peer-reviewed studies are marking this theory as false, due to the lack of similarity in the angle of the frame from Hitmen For Hire, which is more of a three-quarter view, and Nojak, which is head-on.
See also
Cobblestone is a porn artist ♦ Critical BBC ♦ Dead Sharty ♦ Froot is dead ♦ Froot is Kuz ♦ Furry artist ♦ Infinite dubs ♦ Kuz is Trump ♦ Mist is Quote ♦ Moot is Soot ♦ Nojak Columbine ♦ Pooner takeover ♦ Quote is an Epstein agent ♦ Salt is Quote ♦ Sentient nameroll ♦ Trans BBC ♦ variant:unknown ♦ We all died in 2012 ♦ Namefags are supported by the admins


