Brimstone
This page, against all logic, is a gem.
>literally obsessed brimstone o algo
THIS IS LITERALLY FOUL SILESIAN VANTAYELLOW BRIMSTONE RIPPED FROM THE CORE OF /B/!!!!!!!!!!!
Brimstone or sulfur is an obsessed form of coal from hell that actively harms the posters who view it due to how incredibly low-quality it is. That shit can hurt yo eyes cuza' how trash dat shi is Brimstone is often considered to be even worse than dust, with prolonged viewing posing a serious risk to the viewer's body and soul. These sinister posts' evil qualities commonly lead to the obsessed derailment of otherwise gemmy threads. Some types of brimstone rapidly proliferate like an obsessed cancer before dying out just as quickly. Overall, brimstone is a very obsessed and macabre quality of post, and should generally be avoided. Most people who post brimstone WILL obsessively burn.
NOTE: Brimstone isn't vantablack. it's actually Vantayellow
Brimstone is sometimes called Cheesestone due to it's yellow appearance
The term brimstone (as well as coal), comes from Psalm 11: Upon the wicked He will rain coals; Fire and brimstone
Many images that meet the brimstone criteria can be traced back to Twitter, where users who have little to no knowledge about soyjaks attempt to make 'jaks of their own.
As noted by the Holy Soyble in Nate 18:25: "It is easier for a plus-sized black trans queen to go through the eye of a needle than for a poster of brimstone to enter the kingdom of Soot". This implies that posters of brimstone (and potentially those who enjoy it) will burn in Hell for eternity.
 WARNING: BRIMSTONE AHEAD!
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Etymology[edit | edit source]
"Brimstone" comes from the Old English word "brynstan", from brin-, a stem of brinnen, meaning "to burn", from Proto-Germanic *brennan- "to burn", from Proto-Indo-European *gwher- "to heat, warm" + stan "stone", from Proto-Germanic *stainaz, from Proto-Indo-European *stoi-no-. Middle English forms include brymston, brimston and bremston.[1]
Types of Brimstone[edit | edit source]
Silesian brimstone consists mostly of sulfur but with some impurities. As a result, it is not as strong as the other types, but can still coal up the log in high enough quantities. A notable example of Silesian brimstone is the Polish BBC spammer.
Bhutanese brimstone is around 99.89% pure. It is much stronger than the Silesian type and small doses of it can turn the entire catalog into dust. It is recommended that you avoid exposure to Bhutanese brimstone, as it has a high chance of causing nigger AIDS.
Congolese brimstone is 100% pure elemental sulfur from the deepest, darkest pits of Niggerhell. After its discovery, Belgian authorities sealed off all brimstone mines in the Congo and erased any information about it that they could get their hands on. As a result, not much is known about Congolese brimstone, but soyentists theorize that it could completely destroy the Sharty. It is speculated that Poopson is made out of Congolese brimstone.[2]
Kosovar brimstone is 235% more pure, and brimmier than Congolese Brimstone. Also called "Vantablack Brimstone", this variant is so coaly that even Niggerhell had to make a Deep Altar where it is tucked away known as Greater Niggerhell. In this region of Niggerhell, no regular Brimstone Poster could ever survive, and it is where 'S is made from (Child Scat Videos, this is worse than 'P) since it's so coaly as fuck. The place where Kosovar Brimstone is made is where the Sharty Killing Coal (Vantadeath) Poster resides in.
Brimgularity, also called "VANTABLACK NIGGERSTONE" is the purest form of brimstone, as any other form with an extreme concentration of sulfur naturally collapses into it. It lies at the very heart of Niggerhell, which happens to be the absolute deepest point. Even the coal demon shivers in fear just from someone mentioning its existence. It is said to have destructive potential so great that trying to bring a sample of it to the outside world would destroy the whole universe.
Obsessed Brimstone is most commonly found in Mexico. Specifically, inside the intestines of Mexicans and other Latinxes, close to the rectum. Mexicans are the most efficient exporters of Obsessed Brimstone, since anything they eat will be converted to Obsessed Brimstone and be sharted out their hairy skibidi gyatt fat asses. It is suspected that obsessed brimstone is a key component of a mexican brap.
The most well-known exporter of Obsessed Brimstone is satoko_houjou_fan.
See also[edit | edit source]
Citations
- ↑ https://www.etymonline.com/word/brimstone
- ↑ because... I said so, ok?
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