Soyrusalem

Mazel tov! Soyrusalem is Kosher!

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Soyrusalem is a town established by CobsonTALKS and Gold on Minecraft server "EarthPol" It was founded on June 7 2025 by CobsonTALKS, before being quickly handed over to Gold. The city was considered the successor to Terradivisa's soypolis. Gold's rule had been widely lauded among members of the Gempire of Soot for his percieved incompetence and impulsiveness in leading the country. The Gempire & Soyrusalem was first conceptualized on June 6th on a raid thread, and officially established on June 9th. The first iteration ended on June 13th, however a second attempt started December 19th and has exceeded far past the original June plans.

They were known in the server for causing immense seethe among the native population of Earthpol by chudding up chat. And it is currently the fastest growing and largest nation in population density.

The First Attempt

Pre-Gempire

Throughout June 6-9th 2025, the people of Soyrusalem would go through a lot development. Going from half a dozen members to 65 in just three days. Despite their numbers, the military efficiency of the City was extremely poor compared to other factions due to lack of equipment. In this time of military deficiency they developed a guerilla warfare tactic calling "Axing" where they ambush an enemy with nothing but stone axes and a shield, mostly in a group no smaller than 4. Other nations; Jerusalem, Cyprus and the German Confederation would develop resentment towards the ShartyBVLLS that inhabitated their server. Causing Gold to set up alliances with factions; Rhodesia, Albania and Agartha.

Sacking of Jerusalem

The sacking of Jerusalem was a campaign to pacify and destroy Jerusalem, a settlement created by a normgroid to LARP as the heccin' wholesome crusaders. Tension began on June 7th when a user called Overplans began destroying Soyrusalem's crops and farm animals using lava buckets, causing Gold to turn off block permissions for outsiders. Overplans would later demand a 50% income tax; however, Gold would call him a "filthy goy" and burn him with lava thereafter. After this, roughly six 'teens would follow the pajeet on the map and kill him twice as revenge.

In response to the tensions, XTHEsilent, the supposed leader of Jerusalem, would try negotiating with Gold. However, Gold declined, demanding either full annexation of Jerusalem or the destruction of their town. The leader would in return reject the offer, and thus the Sacking of Goyrusalem began with a user calling upon all soyteens to grief the unprotected buildings of Jerusalem. Their place was severely lavacasted to oblivion and all their crops were destroyed. 'Teens would later begin to set chunk claims around the two problematic settlements to surround them and prevent expansion, these claims were later deleted by some jannies.

Soyteen-Rhodesian Alliance

On June 9th Soyrusalem would get assaulted by Cypriot larpers, causing massive amounts of resource loss due to the death count. As a result, Gold struck up a conversation with Rhodesia larpers on Discord to aid them with supplies, and military support in case of another invasion. As of 6/8, Cyprus has announced its plans to invade Soyrusalem, with Rhodesia supporting the latter in the aforementioned invasion.

Allegations of corruption by Gold

On June 8th, allegations against Gold, Soyrusalem's current mayor, were made, stating that he was a "Turkish corder", and furthermore that he abused his mayoral powers of Soyrusalem by removing several members after they complained about gold (the server's currency) being wasted.

Gempire of Soot

Main article: Gempire_of_Soot

On June 9th, Gold would establish the Kingdom of Soot, later renamed to the Gempire of Soot. Besides Soyrusalem, it has a settlement in the Sinai.

Raid on Gaza & Levantine-Cypriot War

Soyteen losses during the conflict

After the establishment of the Kingdom of Soot, a conflict immediately broke out between Cypriots led by user Apigale and Soyrusalem, led by 33Faq. The war's reasoning was reportedly the Cypriots' attempt to attack a Rhodesian settlement. Owing to the lack of experience and gear of the Levantine army, heavy losses were taken by the Soyteens, of whom were reportedly attacking with stone weaponry against the Cypriots equipped with diamond gear and armor. Consensus was formed shortly thereafter that the war was a stalemate, with Gold notably expressing immense rage in the Levantine nation chat and kicking several members for continuing to raid the Gaza settlement after the war's end. Gold was lauded after a stalemate had been formed for his percieved mishandling of the conflict, as well as lashing out in nation chat and kicking one member. This battle notably resulted in the beginning of the ongoing conflict between the Cypriots and Soyteens.

Aftermath

The raid, which was a loss largely owing to the discrepancy in equipment between the Cypriots' forces and the Soyrusalemites, led to a regearing of the Levant's armed forces taking place. As of June 11th, the vast majority of its raiders were equipped with enchanted diamond equipment as a result of Gold's demands.

Southern Incursion

On June 11th, roughly two Cypriots launched a small-scale incursion into the southern border of Soyrusalem. A defense force composed mostly of diamond armor-equipped players led by CobsonTALKS was quickly formed to respond, pushing the two raiders back to Gaza. A short skirmish then took place between the Cypriots and 'teens before a stalemate was formed directly on the border between Soyrusalem and the wilderness. Attempts were made at utilizing both lava and arrows to attach each side, but with little results. The combatants gradually withdrew from their positions shortly thereafter.

Gempire of Soot's territory in white, foreign territory marked with red. As of June 9th.

Siege Update

On June 13th, an update to Earthpol will be released allowing for nations to besiege other nations'. Gaza, under Cyprus, has announced its plans in advance to besiege Soyrusalem once the update releases.

Final days of the Gempire

After one month of the Gempire of Soot being established we eventually lost too many soyteens thanks to jannies being obnoxious niggers who helped our enemy on the first siege, most 'teens stopped playing afterwards because of poor management of the nation (Gold being a retarded nigger by giving perms to any nigger who asked and eventually one of them stole all our reserves of gold) and the aftermath of the first siege agaisnt gazacucks being helped by staff members which demoralized a lot of 'teens. The final days were not sour and we rejoiced on the experience and fun we had baiting the general chat and ambushing unironic faggots and corders and the funny times where we carpet bombed gaza and leveled an entire mountain just to spite...and it was a very gemmy experience.

The Aftermath of the fall of Soyrusalem

After Gold had resigned and quit the server the city got sold off to Byzantium and plundered of anything valuable. First its territory has been reduced and later on the city was completely wiped off by the jannies. The whole area where Soyrusalem stood was rolled back to its original state and its claims got greately reduced. Now under a new name and owner whats left of the city remains empty and abandoned, a shadow of what it used to be.

Territories By June 14th:

Soyrusalem (Capital) - Levant

• 1. Gold mine outpost - North America
• 2. Diamond mine outpost - Southern Africa
• 3. Creeper XP farm - Unknown
• 4. Turkey Military outpost - Southern Anatolia

Soykanda - Levant

Jewtopia - 2nd Colonization

Take Back Our Future

Jewtopia is a minecraft faction founded by CORE_DUMP_ on the server earthpol. It was funded by the co-owner of the server 0xbit with a shulker of 15 stacks of golden blocks.^🗝️

In December 19 2025 Gold would re-enter the server and re-establish Soyrusalem under the nation "Jewtopia", also known as Kiketopia.

December 20th, the Roman Empire and some other snca nation declared a crusade on Jewtopia, but nothing major has happened. Also on December 20th, a Roman requests to duel one of us in Rome, which is accepted.

December 21st - 23rd, Soyrusalem would buy out the Gaza strip however this included an Algerian named Apigale. Xhe seethed and made a new Gaza. 'teens would demolish all buildings along the Gaza strip and transport the materials into Soyrusalem, as well as build a huge moat along NuGaza. Many nations, Oceanic and Roman Empire sent spies using invisibility potions to scout out the NuSoyrusalem. A random person named AIPACBeneficiary part of the New York nation communicates and has aligned ximself with Soyrusalem, trading and helping us out. It is unknown whether or not xhe is an actual Jew or a 'teen.

As of December 26th, all 'teens got bored with the game and are no longer playing.

Enemies:

• CoomerPornKink: QBSESSED nigger who calls us blasphemous or something like that, leader and only resident of the west bank AKA masada.
• Roman Empire: Xhey declared many 'teens outlaws, however no official war declaration yet.

• Al Umayyad Caliphate - Syria: Is completely obsessed with xheir leader talking in chat about how xhe hates soyrusalem, but also wants to make 'teens help xim out.

• NuGaza: A Gazatranny called "Apigale" or Ackigale, was forced to join soyrusalem after the gaza strip being sold cheap to the soyrusalem. Thereby making Ackigale part of the nation, shortly after 'teens destroyed every building in Gaza and Ackigale began leaking, xhe made a new town called Gaza 2.

allies

• new england
• AMERICA
• iran

Geg Gallery:

• 
  Waiting Game
• 
  Syrian Leakage
• 
  Soyrusalem as of December 21st.

Nucopypasta:

Oh wow, another “epic Minecraft raid” manifesto from the same guys who think larping as “kikes” in a block game is peak comedy. Truly the pinnacle of based chud energy.

“NEVER FORGET WHAT THEY DID TO OUR BELOVED CITY, SOYRUSALEM.”

Bro, you got griefed in a 12-year-old sandbox game and you’re out here writing a blood oath like it’s the fall of Constantinople. Touch grass. Or at least touch a real city that wasn’t built by 15-year-olds on a server that smells like stale Cheetos.

“Gather 256 gold ingots so we can /t create a town.”

256 gold ingots? That’s not a town, that’s a mid-tier base you’ll lose in a week when someone with a stack of TNT logs on at 3 AM. You’re not building a nation; you’re building a very expensive sandcastle for the sea to wash away.

“Induce as much seethe as possible… do not become a nation as long as possible so they cannot conquer us. Be a (((Jew))).”

Ah yes, the classic “I’m so based I’m literally antisemitic in Minecraft” strat. Nothing screams “I’m a winner” like hiding behind a town name that’s just a slur with a Minecraft prefix. And the “be a (((Jew)))” part? Peak irony poisoning. You’re not trolling the server; you’re just proving the stereotype you’re mocking is accurate. Self-own of the century.

“Infiltrate other nations and steal from them like the kikes we are.”

You’re literally advertising that you’re going to grief, steal, and grief again while hiding behind “it’s just a larp.” The admins will have you banned faster than you can say “oy vey.” And when they do, you’ll cry “censorship” on the sharty like you’re Anne Frank with a keyboard.

“View World map + Location: https://earthpol.com/map/…”

Yeah, sure, drop the exact coords so the server can watch you get spawn-camped for the next three months. Genius opsec, king. Truly the masterminds behind the “guerilla warfare” of a game where you can fly with a rocket and blow up everything in one night.

This whole thing reads like a 16-year-old’s revenge arc written by someone who’s never won a single PvP fight in his life. You’re not “instigating” anything except the server staff’s ban hammer.

Keep larping as a Minecraft Jew, though. It’s the only thing you’re good at.

Stay seething, stay small, stay banned. Gemmy raid, bro. Truly.