Coffee
Coffee is a gem.
>even doe energy drinks like c4 are gooder
Coffee is a drink that is made out of ground coffee beans. It was reportedly discovered in Ethiopia and Yemen. In its pure, unadulterated form, it has a brownish color and contains the stimulant caffeine. Coffee spelt backwards is eeffoc, which is funny.
When Soyjaks and/or wagies feel tired after waking up, they like to drink it to get ready for their grinding job as moderators on Reddit and/or McDonalds, even doe this will create a vicious cycle and just make them more tired.
Soyjaks enjoy a variety of coffees. Some choose to include soy milk in their drink, due to their lactose intolerance. Pumpkin spice latte is the favorite drink of Female Gapejak and Troonjak. On the other side of the spectrum, soyjaks like Cobson always ask for black coffee for their manliness larp. Alcoholics prefer White Russian coffee. Another choice is decaf, which is enjoyed most often by homosexual soyjaks.
The Café, originally an aryan invention with its origins in Vienna, was subverted by da joos, leading to the creation of the largest café chain in the world, Starbucks (also known as Goybucks). Starbucks is commonly enjoyed by anti-establishment soyjaks, troons and leftycucks, where they often relax in the le wholesome rustic aesthetic while sipping on their industrial factory-produced covfefe mined (YOU CAN'T FUCKING MINE COFFEE THERE IS NOT COFFEE IN THE GROUND IT'S JUST A FIGURE OF SPEECH YOU STUPID CHUD) by starving African children.
Signs of coffee addiction[edit | edit source]
- Being randomly fucked by tyrone
- Not being able to sleep
- Seeing schizojak in the corner of your eye
- Randomly turning on the kettle and forgetting about it
