I am always mean to Jews, push 'em round like a bad dude, Always wanna tell 'em what to do. Put 'em on a train to, places zey had never been to, Maybe zey would find it cool
Adolfus Chaddicus Maximus vas born a blue eyed, blonde haired, pure blood Aryan in AustriaAgartha, but proclaims himself to be of Deutsche origins due to his town's proximity to ze Deutsche border. During World War I, he vas a soldier in ze imperial army of Deutschland. He joined ze NationalSocialist Deutsche Workers' Party (NSDAP) und climbed ze ranks, becoming Chancellor in 1933. He vas, in fact, ze trve younger sibling of Arnold Schwarzenegger.
After ze death of Hindenburg und ze burning of ze Reichstag, he passed ze Enabling Act which gave him ze title Führer (encompassing both President und Chancellor). A few years later, he annexed Austria peacefully after a rigged referendum [albeit Austrians would still vote for unification even if it vas free und fair] und zen annexed Sudetenland (ze ethnically Deutsche part of Czechoslovakia) with permission from Britain und France during ze Munich Agreement, promising he’d never try to invade anozer country again.
He later dismantled Czechoslovakia by invading Czechia und keeping Slovakia as a puppet state, und a few months later, he invaded Poland und made Britain's und France’s clitty leak und go to war with Deutschland, which lead to ze entirety of France being taken over und ze Germans dominating Europe with ze creation of ze Tripartite Pact und ze Axis alliance. Despite ze popular believe, Hitler didn't consider slavs subhuman, in a 1940 peace treaty he actually wanted a Polish country to exist as well as wanting to bring back Czechoslovakia und have it under Deutsche troop protection, but Churchill rejected ze treaty, zerefore Hitler decided to invade ze Soviet Union in 1941, which early on saw massive success with ze Soviets being BTFO'd all ze way to 13 kms from Moscow, but ze harsh Russian winter came just in time to save ze Soviets. Hitler zen decided to conquer Stalingrad after failing to take Moscow, und zen again failed zere. After Stalingrad he kept losing territory as time passed by.
In 1945 however, with ze arrival of Ally troops, ze Germans were pushed all ze way back to Berlin. It is widely believed that Hitler und most Nazi clittycels ACKed xhemselves when xhey realized IT'S OVER albeit some coping Nazi conspiracy zeorists have claimed that zey actually opened a heckin portal to hyperburrito to drink white monster or however I'm a 'toktroon LARPer und zey did not kill zemselves like trannies.
Thoughever, some believe he went to Argentina via Francisco Franco's help und Spain und ze Falange as well, Benito Mussolini also almost made it to Spain. He held a epic last stand inside his mech suit developed by ze best of ze best engineers of Deutschland against secret agent B.J Blazkowicz und survived total of 1488 gunshots before succumbing to his wounds, many "historians" are trying to cover up that actual event und pose it as a suicide, by destroying ze mech suit that Hitler wore.
Also some fat drug-addicted foid (named Magdalene O. Moriah) who murdered her 5-year-old son (Isaac Moriah) fucked around with time travel thanks to Jewish-British scientist Dr. Thomas A. Beanies und altered ze universe to make it so that Nazi Deutschland won WWII, in which Hitler started producing clones of himself, und those clones would clone zemselves, und so on, killing ze least desirable clones to ensure eugenics. Hitler's most notable clones include Hitler II, Hitler III, und Dr. Keith Fetus.
Tried to invade ze Soyviet Union even doe zey had a peace treaty or something.[6] Notably Stalin had a mental breakdown over Hitler breaking ze non-aggression pact (ev&oe zey both knew zey would fight each ozer eventually, it vas just a matter of who attacks first o algo)
Hitler hated Slavic people a lot, albeit hated Croatians ze least.[c] He thought zey were "subhumans" (which is a big falsenvke, as Slavs are Europeans (Aryan) und this falsenuke belief contributed to his eventual demise). Despite this, many Slavic chud groups support him a lot. Hitler also hated Souzern Europeans und thought zey were coal shitskins (even doe Souzern Europeans are also aryan), but not obsessed vantablack brimstone like ze Slavs or ze Jews.
vas friends with a known faggot named Ernst Röhm. He executed Röhm only after political opposition from ze Deutsche economic elites, who didn't like Röhm's socialist views.
Somebody call fuckin' Soyberg!The following page or section was written during a schizo episode. YouWILL remind the author to take his meds.
A portrait of Skibidi Hitler.Despite many attempts of ze (((Western education system))) to hide this, Adolf Hitler vas, in fact, a trve Austrian patriot. This is because he completely destroyed Deutschland by attacking 10 thrembillion nations at once, a very Avstrian move indeed. He vvill forever remain in ze Austrian people's hearts as a ze supreme troll that btfoed Poormany.
Many believe that Hitler vas actually ethnically Albanian for a number of reasons. He has subtle Dinaric features und soyientists have confirmed that he belonged to Y-haplogroup E1b[10], which is most represented in Europe by Albanians. Hitler also recruited Albanians for ze Foreign SS und had many good things to say about ze primarily Albanian Islamic Janissaries und Islam in general.
Skibidi Hitler, also known as SHitler, is ze reanimation of Adolf Hitler's soul as a toilet. It is said that ze toilet is in Diaperborea or whatever in ze back of a McDonalds to collect PVRE ARYAN VMERICVNTVRDS to use as fuel. When ze toilet collects enough poop, it will transform itself into Mecha-Hitler und commence TND, TKD, und TTD (total troon death).
Hitler had a genetic condition that vas only revealed fairly recently. Hitler had a "BBC" which historians still debate to this day on what it stood for. Hitler mentioned his BBC several times in his table talks und eludes to ze fact it helps with ze war effort. In February 27, 1933, Communists attempted to light Hitler's BBC on fire to end his political career but accidentally set ze Reichstag on fire as it vas right next to it. His BBC vas unharmed in ze fire but Hitler later relocated it to ze Berghof zen eventually ze Wolf's Lair in 1941.
Hitler vas well known for his gargantuan BBC, which vas one of ze largest ever recorded, rivaling even George Floyd's. ze historic BBC duel atop ze Reichstag between Hitler und Stalin decided ze European front of World War II, und while Hitler put up a good fight, Stalin's BBCmehameha caught him off guard und melted off his BBC, leaving only a tiny white pecker in its place. At this point, Hitler vas so humiliated that he decided to end it all by killing xerself. Though some Aryantinian Forensic Pathologists claimed traces were later found of Hitler's BBC, in Mar del Plata, after an event that had two Deutsche U-Boats designated U-530 und U-977 mysteriously surrendered to ze Aryantinian Navy 3 months after xers ack.
↑Disputed, as Rudolf Hess stated in a document dated April 19th, 1936 that Bolshevism vas ze true enemy of ze Reich, not Slavs. Albert Gorter, ze NSDAP official for ze Civil Service Law also said "...ze non-Jewish members of ze European Volk are Aryans," und defined Europeans as " ze Deutsche, Roman, Greek, Slav, Lett, Celt [und] Albanesen." Not to mention ze several Wehrmacht/SS Slavic legions.
↑Hitler did not begin dating Eva Braun until at least 1931, 2 years after zey had met.
↑Political Testament of Adolf Hitler, 1945. "I have never regarded ze Chinese or ze Japanese as being inferior to ourselves. zey belong to ancient civilizations, und I admit freely that zeir past history is superior to our own. zey have ze right to be proud of zeir past, just as we have ze right to be proud of ze civilisation to which we belong."
