Splicesoning

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Splicesoning
Part of Soience vs Alchemy Wars

Kolyma's Splicing Laboratory. This is banner ID 55.
DateMarch 2023
Location
/soy/, /pol/, /incel/
Result Eradication of the alchemists
Belligerents
Splice Jakers Tab Jakers
Strength
~30 Soientists ~15 Alchemists
Casualties and losses
Unknown All Alchemists

On March 6, 2023, a chud accidentally stumbled across a gem while looking through his tabs and created the "splice thread"[1]. This spurred forth the creation of "splicejak" or “tabjak”[2]. While splicejak on his own would have been a gem, soyteens did not stop there and began to mix together various jaks, creating the forbidden alchemic art of ‘jak splicing.

Conflict[edit | edit source]

Name Drama[edit | edit source]

Despite originally being called "tabjak", splicejak became known as "splicejak". It was believed that a splicejaker went into the booru and changed the subvariant tag of every splicejak from "tabjak" to "splicejak". While there was some displeasure stirred by this, it did not stop the splicing trend.

Science vs Magic[edit | edit source]

At some point the debate as to whether splicejaking was a form of soience or magic began. The soientists claimed that because the process was "splicing" it was soience and that magic was blasphemy before Dr.Fauci. Galvanized by these claims, the alchemists started calling them tabjaks and declared war on soience. While the exact time frame of this conflict has been lost to history, it is estimated to have lasted between 1-2 weeks and took place mainly on /soy/ but leaked into /incel/ and /pol/. The threads mainly revolved around which sides could create the best splicejaks/tabjak and prove their side superior. Eventually through superior numbers the splicejakers succeeded, driving away all alchemists to the unknown.

/x/[edit | edit source]

There are rumors and whispers of tabjakers making alchemy threads in /x/ during the froot era, although if true any signs of which are long gone.

Consequences[edit | edit source]

SpliceJak hysteria

The alchemy of splicing jaks is seen by many soyteens as anti-soience and an affront to Dr Fauci. Out of fear of splicejaks and their potential, many are calling for their ban from the Sharty.

On the Booru[edit | edit source]

Splicejaks also had very poor reception on the 'ru from the beginning, because of the big divide between the the 'ru and the sharty. In other words, the user base of these communities don't have very much overlap. Despite this, many splicejaks have found their way to the booru.

On the Sharty[edit | edit source]

The battle between Alchemists and Soitists had left many 'teens confused, largely killing of splicing in general. Despite this, Splicejak itself has become a relatively common subvariant and is still seen from time to time posted on /soy/ or in large jakking projects. One major appearance is in the Cobson Krause SMV.

Citations

Splicesoning is part of a series on
Soyjak variants
Visit the Soyjak Variants portal for more.
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