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A24 Slow-Burn Soyjak: Difference between revisions
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== Lore {{Quote|>oh my heccin fanfictionero}} == | == Lore {{Quote|>oh my heccin fanfictionero}} == | ||
Alexander Birch Ford, nicknamed "A24," was born on March 23, 1985 in Boston, Massachusetts. However he moved to San Francisco, California at 4 years old in the same neighborhood as [[Soyak#Early life (>I heckin love fanfiction!!!111)|Soyak]], He had a pretty rough childhood and was constantly bullied at age | Alexander Birch Ford, nicknamed "A24," was born on March 23, 1985 in Boston, Massachusetts. However he moved to San Francisco, California at 4 years old in the same neighborhood as [[Soyak#Early life (>I heckin love fanfiction!!!111)|Soyak]], He had a pretty rough childhood and was constantly bullied at age 15 over his obsession with Star Wars and Disney movies. Other than that he went to the same high school [[Rapeson#Early Life|John Oberman]] when too named Lowell High School, He would later in life apply for a job at Ford at the age of 19 {{Frogtext|and get fired seven years later}}. He became a well-known movie critic in 2015 under the name "Slowburn Reviews", but eventually turned into a gegBVLL due to his various shitty opinions. He's still criticizing movies to this day. | ||
=== Naming === | === Naming === | ||
Revision as of 04:58, 2 August 2026
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THE FOLLOWING FEATURES  |
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The A24 Slow-Burn Soyjak (often shortened to just A24) is a slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling kino primary soyjak variant. He is best known for being one of the oldest variants, having been released just under four months after the original. He is also the first slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling kino soyjak to be traced from a real-life soyboy instead of being a Wojak derivative, as well as the lowest-resolution classic variant.
A24 is a rollable name on soyjak.party.
History
On March 23, 2018, /tv/ exploded with a slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling kino discussion and mockery pertaining to the JewTube reactor James Youniverse and his slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling, over-the-top kino soyface reaction to slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling kino capeshit movie trailers. The same day, somebody traced a soyjak of him and uploaded it to one of the mockery threads under the filename soy.png.[1]
Lore >oh my heccin fanfictionero
Alexander Birch Ford, nicknamed "A24," was born on March 23, 1985 in Boston, Massachusetts. However he moved to San Francisco, California at 4 years old in the same neighborhood as Soyak, He had a pretty rough childhood and was constantly bullied at age 15 over his obsession with Star Wars and Disney movies. Other than that he went to the same high school John Oberman when too named Lowell High School, He would later in life apply for a job at Ford at the age of 19 and get fired seven years later 
Naming
During and preceding the marketing campaign for The Lighthouse in mid-2019, the as-of-then unnamed soyjak became heavily associated with bone-chilling, character-development-driven, cheap-jumpscare-free, emotionally-draining, slow-burn "horror kino" created by A24, due to a gigachad spammer with a vendetta.[2][3] The connection has stuck ever since.
Mutation
Sometime around 1976, the CIA would start kidnapping A24 soyjaks and experimenting with them. From late 1986 to late 1990, around 19 test subjects called "Fingerboys" and "Flying Niggers" (15 Fingerboys and 4 Flying Niggers) would escape. The CIA terminated 2 Flying Niggers and 5 Fingerboys, but before they could find the rest, they had already repopulated enough to avoid extinction.
Flying Niggers and Fingerboys are NOT real and were NOT created by the CIA. You WILL take your meds and not investigate further.
Reception
It is safe to say that A24 has been popular since his creation, and has always been regarded as one of the main soyjak variants alongside Soyjak, Gapejak, and Markiplier Soyjak. One could argue that he is not as popular as he used to be when compared to other main variants, with relatively few staff or namefags self-inserting as him. Still, he is regarded as a gemerald and was even used as the first logo of Soyjak Wiki.
Gallery
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A24 as the Anonymous logo.
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This is often posted on /soy/ along with "What are your fetishes?"[4]
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We aliens are the real aryans ⍜⍀ ⌇⍜⋔⟒⏁⊑⟟⋏☌
![This is often posted on /soy/ along with "What are your fetishes?"[4]](/File:Fetishes.png)
See also
- Jacobson - The slow-burn, cheap-jumpscare-free, bone-chilling kino deformed subvariant of A24.
